Garden Mountain Earthworks LLC, our latest (if not greatest?) corporate entity formally came into being 8/9/2006. This, at least partially, explains why I've not posted in some time. I've been too busy being "a Captain of Industry". Sorry. In my own defense I want to say that I've had 67 corporate lunches and "entertainment expense items" and have thoroughly squandered the retirement plans of all our employees since my last post.
In memory of my past employer (HP), I've instigated covert coverage of all employees in hopes of finding out who on the board has been divulging important corporate info to the Garden Valley press corps.
But I digress.
What I really want to discuss is a new way to give an insurance agent a cardiac. I've almost knocked-off ours by uttering the phrase, "Our son just finished driver's ed." He's a hardy soul though and had survived my attempts...until I found the "Magic E-word". I happened upon the magic word while attempting to secure liability insurance for the newly-hatched Earthworks enterprise. I called our State Farm agent and told him of the new company. He seemed genuinely pleased. That was until he asked what the new biz was about and I said "Excavation". At that point I could hear choking and it sounded for all the world like the dude had swallowed a rubber chicken or that dead lizard that the i/o had found. A few minutes later he apologized and said that his assistant would be calling back later.
Well, she did. This was "Tammy the Assistant" who was well-known for having the real brains behind our agents operation. It embarrassed me once to call our agent and ask for Tammy...but that's another story. Tammy the Assistant (and Brains) told me that State Farm didn't insure companies that did excavation. I couldn't understand that given how safe digging trenches is. (Actually, digging is pretty safe...it's the working at the bottom of the trench that has been known to cause problems.) Actually the Happy Kubota, realistically, refuses to dig trenches deeper than 3-4 feet. I tried to explain that, but I had mentioned the deadly 'E' word and the water was thus poisoned and no explanations (facts) would set the insurance train back on the track.
Well, what to do now? I turned to the Internet because I trust everything I read from that source. I went to something like "dumbassinsuranceagents.com" and requested a quote from one of the local (Boise) agents. My first email from this guy was positively wonderful. He waxed poetic in describing how much he'd like to insure my small company. Then I dropped the 'E'-bomb on him. He never got back to me. I wonder why.
Actually I hate to admit it, but I was somewhat in the dark about reasons nobody wanted to talked to me about my biz. Then I had the "E-word Epiphany". I decided to battle this problem with a Thesaurus...and vowed to never use the accursed "E-word" again.
In retrospect I can understand why insurers would be hesitant to insure excavators...so I chose to choose words which better describe what I do.
Stitch made a few uncharitable suggestions in that regard.
Eventually, what I settled on was Sprinkler installation since that's closest to what I really do which deals mostly with routing/fixing irrigation and potable water lines and "stuff" that our real backhoe moron breaks or does half-assed. Excavation really isn't what the new biz is about but seemed like a good catchall phrase. But I learned my lesson.
Just today when preparing an invoice for the homeowner's association, I caught myself about to use the dreaded word. I changed the E-word to the phrase "overburden displacement" in describing the digging-up a drain pipe and relocation of it to another area in which I had performed "overburden displacement" (AKA trenching, AKA ditching, AKA E-word).
posted by Spudgunner @ 7:21 PM
1 Comments:
I think your experience is the same as the trapEze artists. They had to change their job description to something like Horizontal Balance Specialists. Of course they had to change their name from the Flying Wallendas to something more anonymous like the Family Entertainment Committee.
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